Wednesday, June 5

words for wednesday {page 6, wait}

“He also serves who only stands and waits.”

John Milton

But I want to be on the frontlines, I say. Can I at least work part time and cook dinner for my husband? I’m sick of just drinking tea and knitting things and recovering from things.* I'm so over this. I want to do something which doesn’t feel like nothing.

I think those things as I grapple with the way things are, my lot.

* You may think: but drinking tea & knitting is my idea of paradise, as is not having to go to work. All I can say is that several weeks of rest each year is beautiful, but indefinite waiting is hard.

And then I heard the above quote by blind poet John Milton - and stopped fighting.

I’m not the General and I don’t know what the plan for the battle is. I’m one of the troops, and if I’m sent here or there or not sent at all, that is where I am meant to be.  This is my role at the present, and by patiently waiting and accepting it, I am serving. It re-dawned on me how sufficient that is. God hasn’t forgotten my assignment, and if I can bear it well, that is a life well spent. 

“To be blind is not to be miserable. Not to be able to bear blindness is miserable.”

John Milton

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