Tuesday, July 30

thirteen things i do to stay okay

Facebook is not a good place to linger. It’s nice to share in people’s joys as they display their highlights reel, but the second thought after joy for them is, ‘but what about me?! Why have I not been in a photo shoot, graduated, got pregnant, made something original, been to europe or thought of something funny to say?” This addiction ends in greater sadness at my own lot. 

Sunshine is an antidepressant

Crying is an anti depressant

Tea is an anti depressant

Antidepressants (the official kind) can be wonderful and terrible, but it is not embarrassing to be on them. Nor is it embarrassing to sit in the office of a psychiatrist and fight back tears while you tell him that you are scared of holding cups in case you drop them. The mind is complex, and it’s ok for it to get sick, just like your body.

If you find a nice medic, don’t move away or let them retire. If you find a nasty one, cry a bit and get the courage to disengage them.

You can be happy even when your health gives way and your dreams are put aside. You can’t be happy if you hold onto the way you thought things would go. You actually have to surrender, maybe multiple times a day if you’re like me.

Do whatever you need to do to make life manageable. Dare to be unlike those around you and dare to be unashamed. 

Young marriage may seem like a horrifying idea to the majority, but the joy I get from knowing that we are stable when the rest of my life isn’t is indescribable. For me there was nothing more beautiful than the guy I love wanting to commit himself to me, despite my lack of health, career or certain future. I am slightly scarred from all the comments about how we’re still babies, but I’m getting over them.

On that note, lots of people will say/do lots of unkind things to you in your life. Or stupid insensitive things. The longer you are alive and the more comments you hear, the stronger and more bullet proof you become. Crying, again, is reccomended for a short spell. {ps. one benefit of an unpopular blog is lack of mean comments.}
Being at home all day long makes you want a baby desperately, despite physical limitations. Try to be uncommonly rational in this situation (picture babies crying at 2 am) and get a dog or cat if you are struggling.

Things can be true even if you do not understand them. I think my life is valuable even though i stay in the lounge on the couch most of the time. I think I could get better, despite not knowing how.

Every single day, God gives new mercies. Don’t worry if you are empty the night before, because they don’t come till morning. 


  1. love it Dee <3 crying is the best most relieving feeling. thinking of you!

    1. it actually is. i put it on a par with laughing, or maybe it's better? thanks xx

  2. I love your blog. That last line, about God's mercies being new every morning, is exactly what I needed to be reminded of tonight. Thank you. So much :-) xx

    1. You cheered me up :-) I hope you did wake up with the ability to go on. Love xx